As Valentine’s Day approaches, I thought I’d share a few ideas that I actually have in my wallet. I don’t remember where I saw them but they resonated with me so I printed them out to carry around. When I find myself frustrated in my relationship I pull them out and gain a little clarity and perspective.
1. Protect her heart!
If she is willing to place the most delicate thing she owns in your care, guard it, fiercely. Don’t be careless or reckless with it and defend it against others!
2. Protect your own heart.
She cannot love you, fully, unless you love and respect yourself first. It’s not her job to fix your insecurities.
3. Only see the best side of her!
It’s a basic law of the universe; what you put energy into is what will become dominant. If you focus on the things that you deem “imperfect” that will become all you see!
4. Don’t try to change or “fix” her!
We all grow as individuals. Grow with her and respect that growth. If you wanted a different woman, you should have chosen someone else!
5. Be accountable for your own behavior!
It’s not her fault if you find yourself angry or upset at her. Those are your emotions..own them!
6. Let her “be”!
Sometimes we all feel sad, lonely, angry or confused. It’s your job to love and hold her during the times that she feels these things. Expecting her to “get over it” is selfish and unrealistic! If she needs time to be alone to sort through her emotions, give her that time!
7. BE THERE!
When she needs your opinion, your strength and mostly, your shoulder to cry on. Do NOT run away because you don’t know what to do. Most times, she will let you know what she needs. You just have to learn to listen.
8. Be silly!
Laugh, joke, make a fool of yourself over and over again. Show her the side of you that will put a smile on her face in her darkest moment.
9. Fill her soul!
If she likes it when you hold her hand, then hold her hand! If she loves flowers, then bring home flowers on a random Tuesday! Show her that she is the reason you wake up every day!
10. Be present!
She isn’t a client or employer, she more important than that!! Give her your time, attention and focus!
11. Don’t be stupid!
You will both make mistakes. You will both hurt each other to some extent. Don’t see these mistakes and mishaps as the beginning of the end. We are human and this is just human nature!!
12. Be vulnerable!
How can you expect her to trust you with her deepest feelings and fears if you wont trust her with yours? Vulnerability is NOT weakness!
13. Be transparent!
Secrets are best left to the government. If you plan to walk through life together then you have to be completely honest with each other! Omission of the truth is the same as lying!
14. Don’t worry about money!
No matter how much you make, it will never seem like enough! Focus on what you have and not on what you don’t!
15. Forgive immediately!
Is rehashing an argument going to change her mind or make her love you more? NO! Don’t keep score and remember, you make just as many mistakes as her!
16. Always choose love!
Love can conquer all!! It brings us together, it makes every day brighter and it holds us up when we are weak!