Searching for home.

Jenny and I have been house hunting. Somehow, even without a job, we managed to get approved for a home loan.

Right now we are literally throwing away $1400 a month. I live in the apartment, but because of my lease, I’m still paying for the house.

After all the numbers are crunched, we will be paying about the same for a house that we are paying for the apartment but we will have space!

All the kids will have their own space, Jenny and I will have an area that we can watch tv or movies while the kids can play Xbox or watch tv in another room, and we can fit more than one person in the kitchen at once. I know. It is pretty darn close to nirvana!!

The end result is awesome. Getting there is like anything else worthwhile, though. It’s frustrating, annoying, exhausting and scary.

I know I’ll get a job. Jenny knows I’ll get a job. We don’t know what or where, but I refuse to not provide for my family. Until then, my mind is engaging in war with itself: “you’re buying a new house and you don’t have a job? Are you crazy?!”, “we have to live somewhere. We might as well be saving money and have more space where we eventually end up.”

The logical fighting the traditional.

It’s causing tension. I’m short and temperamental. Jenny is emotional. The kids are feeling left out because we aren’t really letting them have a say. Even the dog is lost.

But, we have our moments. There’s excitement, optimism, and laughter. Shit, the way our moods are swinging, I wonder if we are looking for a house or going through menopause!

Jenny and I both have a deep trust in God’s grace. He will take care of us. If we have to work too hard, then it isn’t meant to be. That may sound lazy. It may seem naive. But up until now, that mentality, combined with our own “conservative natures” have served us well.

Today we got an email from our realtor. It included about 32 houses. From those we whittled it down to 7 possibilities based on price, location, work that needs done, etc. After driving to the neighborhoods we then culled the list down to only 3. One had an apartment building in the backyard (not literally, but damn near), 2 were less than 50 feet from a creek that floods, etc.

Then after even further examination the list was dropped to only 2. The one we actually LOVED was a headache waiting to happen. A foreclosure that has had 2 offers that were pulled after the home inspection.

So, we will look at 2. Add that to the 1 that we’ve seen that is still up to snuff and we’re on the right track.

If we can keep from killing each other, or sleeping with a pillow between us, we could find ourselves living happily ever after!


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